‘How did Eddy get the information?’ Jan thought she knew. Eddy worked construction as a sideline and would easily meet up with lots of illegal aliens that were hired to work there as well. ‘Works with some of the relatives. Overheard their worries while on the job. He started talking to a few of them. Not an easy task since he doesn’t quite fit the mold of someone they would trust. He slowly got the information over the last week or so. Seems as if he might have some good information,’ Ward knew that Eddy would never contact him unless he had enough information.
‘The leads could be pretty cold by now,’ there was no doubt in Jan’s mind about that; ‘It could make the job a bit more difficult. Not impossible, just difficult.’ She looked at the passing seagull and then spoke, “Are we going to do the job?”
“No,” and just as quickly as he said the word, his hand came up, effectively blocking the next words coming out of her mouth, as well as her thoughts. He had to play his cards right at this point. “To do the job properly your life would be put in too much danger. I can’t choose to do that to you. Plus you’re right, the leads are too cold,” now he put up the blocks in his mind to keep her out as well.
“Isn’t the first part for me to decide?” Jan turned onto her side balancing on her arm and looked at Ward, studying the line of his jaw. Jan already knew that Ward had closed off areas of his mind to her and she wanted to know why.
“Another time when there are no right answers, huh?” Ward closed his eyes. This was the hard part for Ward, but he kept his focus. He knew what he needed to do and he needed her to be sure of the path she was about to take.
‘What do you mean?’ She forced her thoughts back into his mind, ‘The only right answer is to find these people and put a couple of coyotes out of business for good. It may not stop what’s happening completely, but it just may slow it down for a while. It’s bad enough people are forced to cross the border in this way, but to make the journey even more dangerous, that’s why we need to stop it. And stop it now. Haven’t we always said we wanted to make a difference? Isn’t that one of the reasons why I’m here?’ Jan looked into Ward’s eyes as his head turned toward her, and made sure he was looking back into hers, neither one was new to the underground world and the risks. Without breaking her gaze, she needed to make sure he understood what she was about to say.
“If I had wanted to retire, I could have stayed at the department,” Jan knew those words had hit the soft spot she wanted, it wasn’t fair play, but then again he wasn’t playing fair either. There was another agenda here she hadn’t seen to begin with. She could feel Ward’s mind tighten around that thought and then she felt how he let it go along with his anger. She just stared at him. He needed to know that by not letting her work, he just might lose her.
The problem was that Ward did know it, and didn’t like it. He closed his eyes, he knew what was coming next, “And if you think I am going to spend my time raising a herd of children like Mama Garcia suggests, you need to think again. That’s not us. We were meant to change lives for the better. We were given the skills to help and you’re just going to throw that all away?” Jan sat up and crossed her legs, looking at Ward’s closed eyes.
Mama Garcia, as they both affectionately called her, was the wife of the beach property’s caretaker. Ward had once helped his family with a problem they had had with their son and a nasty group of people. Now, they took care of the house and apartment that Ward and Jan owned. Jan and Ward lived in the apartment, and the Garcias lived in the house and kept the secret.
Jan wasn’t sure what bothered her most. Was it the fact that Ward might think he was in control of her life, or that someone needed to control it? Was it that he just lay there hoping the whole conversation would be washed out to sea? Or was it that there was still something else, something he wasn’t letting her in on.
“Let’s go,” Ward’s voice was flat, lifeless. He swiftly got to his feet and started down the beach again at a quick pace. He knew she wasn’t there yet. His mind was filled with thoughts and emotions, all of which Jan was picking up on until she got a message, ‘Stay out,’ plain and simple, and that was the only hint she needed. He was focusing on a thought that she was not welcome to see. She followed Ward back to the hideaway at the steady pace he set and she let him keep his thoughts to himself for now. Jan worried that this may signal a change in the relationship between them, a change that she had been warned about by an old and dear friend.
Rob, her former partner in the department once told her that Ward would never be happy with any one thing, especially a relationship, for long term. As the years passed, Rob had become more of a father figure, wanting what was best for her. At first it had been her happiness, later, he got protective about the events and sincerity in her relationship. He had known about them, but he hadn’t known about the marriage.
The Ward she had come to know and love, though, had never showed tendencies that would even lead her to believe he was anything but trustworthy and true. In days of old he would have been called a gentleman, but that was not a persona he had shown to anyone but her. Even after he left the department as a wanted man, he kept in contact with her, couldn’t leave her. Each time they had met, it had been dangerous for him. In fact, he had begged her many times to come and join him, to work with him, to make her own choices.
Jan knew they worked well together, played well together, loved well together and that was a bonus. Jan knew that leaving the department and working with Ward was a big step, for both of them. In the department they had been told what case they were to work on and who they worked with. Would they be able to transition into this equal partnership, and share the risk? Now, was the first time that he had ever given Jan cause to worry about whether he was ready for this change as well. Jan was deep in these thoughts when she felt his thought drift onto the edge of her mind.
‘If you want the job, we’ll do it, but,’ he couldn’t bring himself to say it, only through his thoughts could he tell her. Even with the ‘but’ it was enough for Jan. Ward had spent the time on the way home contemplating just how he thought the rest of their lives would be now that the future, a future, had finally presented itself to them. It was hard. She was right; he really did enjoy working as a free agent, and the time he had taken off from it had been hard. He had missed the work. He had also missed working with her, even though he had enjoyed the time off with her. He smiled as he thought about the days, and the nights. Ward also knew there were things he could have done, maybe even should have done. Now that she knew the jobs were coming in, he was also sure, really sure, she wanted to work on them with him. They could now become a team. He had wanted this so much and now it was right in front of him, just one last step.
There were lots of ways to lose someone. He knew that more than any one else. One sure way was to stifle them. If he stifled her, he would lose her and not just for a while, but forever. He had thought about some of the jobs he had done after leaving the department. How would she have felt all those times if she had known what he had been up to? He didn’t want to think about that. As he approached the steps she jumped in front of him, blocking his way.
“Do you mean it? I don’t want to do a job, any job, halfway,” Jan stood there and waited for his answer. Ward could see the spark of life in her eyes, the smile that just barely touched the corner of her lips, but what he really saw was the woman he had fallen in love with.
“Yes,” although he couldn’t bring himself to look her in the eyes after he said it. There was the last bit of realization she had to reach yet. He had gone through it, now it was her turn.
“Are you okay with this?” she could tell that something was bothering him. His eyes avoided hers, his muscles were taut and his face expressionless.
“About as okay as I will ever be with it. But you’re right,” he moved around her and went up the steps, “We’ve always thrived on this type of work, and it is what we do best, and we’ll do it together,” there, it was done. She still had one last step, and Ward would have to let her get there on her own. Soon.
Jan knew this was the partnership he had always promised and what she had given up everything for, but there was still something he wasn’t telling her. That was bothersome. When would they get to that open and honest communication? They couldn’t work together if he wasn’t willing to share. People got killed that way. She took a deep breath, and the sense of calm that had escaped her for days began to creep in as she carefully followed him up the damp stairs. Jan remembered the mantra that Ward had needed and repeated as she had recovered, patience, but just how much longer could they wait?
Even as Jan and Ward walked back up the steps into what they called their safe place they knew that Mexico was not a place everyone would call safe. For many, braving the dangerous and illegal crossing into the states and leaving Mexico was their only hope. It would give them a chance at life, for them and their family. Over the last few years the borders in each state had been reinforced, all except for one, Arizona. The desert was a harsh and brutal place, even in spring. Daytime temperatures could reach into the nineties and nighttime temperatures back into the fifties. Without protection it wasn’t the place to be, boiling and then freezing. Most knew this but with the stronger border enforcements on the neighboring states, it left them very little choice of where there were going to try and cross. Arizona was still the best place to make it across the border and not get caught.
Things were changing though and that meant using coyotes, or smugglers, to increase the chances of success to get across safely. Most coyotes were open about what they did here in Mexico and they knew the type of people to look for. Prowling the bus stations they could almost be assured of a couple of fares.
