Broken Souls ... by Annay Dawson
Chapter 3
Holden pulled into the drive of the best local café around. Driving past the side of the house down the small alley and to the back where the owners had made a small but sufficient parking lot he threw the truck in park and got out. Slowly he straightened up, stretching cautiously taking care not to move too fast as all his muscles rippled with approval. After the hard day's work he had put in at Addison’s he could feel the strain in each and every movement. Slowly, as his arms relaxed and came back in towards his body he closed the truck’s door. He was moving more slowly than he would have liked right now and wouldn’t admitted any of it to Addison, even if she had it video taped and presented it to him. He was supposed to be recovering, some days he wondered if he would or could ever be the man he had been before the accident. He had scars, both inside and out. And even if he didn’t say it, his sister always knew when he overdid it. If it hadn’t been for that helicopter crash he would still be in Afghanistan covering the downsizing of the American forces and the effect of the pullout. Before now he had seen the misery, even written about it, but experiencing it was vastly different. Now his entire world had tipped sideways and backwards. As Cash, one of the guys who had died in the crash, would have put it catty-wampus, and he hadn't written in months.
Holden smiled as he walked toward the door and thought back over the discussion he had made earlier this evening. Addison had saved him from a night surrounded by four eight-year-old girls and filled with shopping and squealing. He had been subjected to this a couple of times when Mia had not only one but two sleepovers soon after he had arrived. They had already been planned and hard to cancel, but all the noise and chaos had put him on edge. A place he didn't like to be when he was with them. Watching Addison earlier as they talked, Holden had known that coping with all this had been harder for his sister since he hadn't told her anything about how he had gotten hurt, how he had changed.
She was trying to balance too many worries. When he had shown up he had known that he didn’t want to be one more, but it was either stay with them or stay longer in the recovery center since they wouldn't allow him to be on his own yet. He was better now, and if he wanted he could have gone back to his lonely little place but why would he. He owed it to both Addison and Mia to be around a bit more after all he had been gone for quite a while. He also needed to set Addy's mind at ease. She worried about Mia and her job, and they should be the only things she should be worried about.
Mia, at the age of eight, could work both her mother and him like a pro. She could have taught the mind monkeys he had had to talk to a thing or two. The first sleepover was when he had first arrived. He had still been using a cane then and had no easy way to escape all the chaos that was uniquely Mia. It was worse than when he had been on assignment in Iraq. At least he had lost enough blood to lose consciousness back then. He hadn’t been as lucky this time.
He had been here long enough now to have lost most of his limp. He didn't need a cane anymore. Addy had used what she could still see to give him a way to escape from the girlie girl get-togethers that Mia seemed to plan with some regularity. Tonight's ambush had happened when he was standing in the kitchen filling a glass of water unaware of what was coming his way. Mia had run into the room with her mother on her heals. Mia though, had only one purpose in mind. Her goal was to beg him to go with her tonight to the mall, her and her friends, to help supervise their hair and nail bash. He had seen no way to avoid the inevitable. Preparing to surrender he was relieved to see Addison’s face, her arms folded securely in front of her, an unmovable force. After all Mia had had him wrapped around her little finger since the day she was born.
“Please, please, please come with us. We are going to have so much fun and Mom says we can go to Pike’s Pizza and I know how much you love Pike’s Pizza,” when she looked at him with those big brown eyes he knew he couldn’t say anything else but yes. Her long black eyelashes batted up and down as she stared up at him with a hopeful little smile on her face. Man she could work it.
“Mia honey,” Addison quickly cut across the conversation that was about to happen and swooped in front of Mia to his rescue. All she had to do was look into Holden’s eyes to know that he needed saving from the unfair emotional argument of a eight year old as well as some rest. After all, today he had again done way too much, “Don’t you think we should let Uncle Holden stay home and rest. I know how much he likes hanging out with you and your friends,” Holden wondered how she had said that with a straight face, “but after all he is trying to get better and he has worked really hard this week helping Daniel's family and doing things around here,” she gave him the look letting him know that she had seen and heard about what he had done. He watched as Mia’s mood began to change, her shoulders drooped and her smile fade.
“Addy if it really is that important to her,” he started to say but he wasn’t allowed to finish. Addison waved her hand at him dismissing his words as she would an unruly child in her classroom. She placed both hands on Mia’s shoulders turning her around and then turned her attention back toward him.
“Holden, Mia will be just fine not having you at her beck and call tonight. I’ll be there with all the girls and could really use the girl time myself as well. Maybe when we get out of here you can take a few minutes to just kick back and relax, and I do mean relax. Feet up, beer in hand. The whole works and not the type of relaxing you’ve been doing,” she stressed the last word as she lifted one eyebrow. “Mia, now go and get ready so we won’t be late,” giving her a gentle nudge. She stood quietly in the kitchen and watched Mia moodily stomp out.
“Thanks Addy,” Holden visibly relaxed as he spoke and it didn’t go unnoticed. Addy and Mia had known about his leg injury. No way to hide that especially since he had been using crutches and then a cane, but they didn’t know about the severe burns he had suffered on his chest and back. Those were still painful and hidden while they were healing. Addy may have suspected there was something else but she had said nothing, waiting on him to talk to her.
“Hon, we both know how much you love her but you need a break from all the girl stuff,” Addison smiled and walked over to him. She grabbed his water glass and took a long sip from it. “That and you have been doing way too much around here especially if you were supposed to be resting and recuperating. I’m pretty sure that doesn’t include painting the house these last few days.” The worst Addison could do was look at him with her brows furrowed a little. She had made a point of not telling Mia how bad she had suspected that Holden had been hurt. What she knew, and Holden didn’t, was that a psychologist had called before he arrived and there had been a long talk about grief and recovery. Whatever he had been through this time must have been way past what she would consider awful. There wasn’t anything left physically, that she could see, but Addison knew he wasn’t here just because he needed to recover from all the physical wounds. She hoped that being here with them would go a long way in helping in other areas.
Mia just loved it when Holden was around and it would scare her to know that at those times that he wasn’t nearby he could be in danger. She spent every moment of the day that she could with her uncle when he was here. Both Addison and Holden knew that when Mia was at school she talked incessantly about him to anyone and everyone who would listen. So much so that her teacher had asked if he would be interested in coming in and reading to the class or helping out. Holden also had a suspicion that there might be other reasons he had been asked as well.
“I’m doing fine and you know that. Painting the house needed to be done and you don’t have time or extra money for it. If I had waited much longer it would be too cold at night,” Holden said and then took the glass and took a sip of water himself, “and I’m thinking about going in to school and helping out in her classroom. While I’m here.” He could hear Addison’s explosive blast of air as she harrumphed him and folded her arms again ready to become the heavy. “Oh come on now, I’m resting the only way I know how to. I won’t get better by sitting on my rear and watching daytime TV. I don't need to see that kind of crap. I may lose my faith in the human condition," he wasn't sure if he hadn't, "I’d rather be reading a book to her class and it would be fun. I take it her teacher didn’t clear it with you first.”
“You are so spoiling her and it will take me a year to get her to stop talking about her hero after you leave again, even if it happens then,” Addison walked over to the fruit bowl on the table and picked up an apple for her then another throwing it at him, “Let’s change the topic. How are you feeling, really?”
“Actually I like spoiling her and who cares if she can’t ever stop talking about me,” taking a bite out of the apple he talked on as he chewed. He was as close to a father as Mia would get unless Addy actually started to date. It was obvious that he was tired as he leaned against the counter more for support than as a casual stance, “As for me, I’m doing much better. I don’t have much pain left in the leg. I haven’t used the cane at all the last few days. I’ve been swimming up at the pond in the mornings as you know and it seems to help,” the cold water had helped a lot with the pain he still felt from the areas of his body that had gotten burned. Holden took another bite of apple and weighed whether or not he should tell Addison about what he was contemplating.
“It’s pretty cold to be swimming up there this time of year,” she watched but didn’t see any reaction. He may be standing here in her kitchen but he was miles away, “Okay, out with it Holden,” Addison put her apple down and placed her hands on her hips as she leaned up against the counter opposite him, “You may be able to hide what you feel from everyone else, but not me big brother.”
“I was just thinking about what I want to do with my future,” he focused on the apple now and paused for what seemed like a long time waiting for a reaction.
“Really?” Addison prompted softly not wanting to spook him, or push him away from the topic.
“Yah, really. Got an email from Tyler,” he smiled and looked back at her, “I might want to make a change, maybe settle down a bit. Stay closer to both of you,” he watched to see if Addison was surprised but she hid it well if she was. However, the conversation ended abruptly as the ever-bouncy eight-year-old Mia came flying back into the room with her pretty pink dress on as well as her furry boots. Flinging her hands out dramatically she announced her arrival.
“I’m ready Mom,” her smile was contagious and Holden reached out and grabbed her in mid bounce and gave her a gigantic hug. She hugged him back enthusiastically and even though it was painful Holden said nothing, hadn't ever said anything. To him it would have been more painful not to accept hugs from her.
“Eat some pizza for me will you Me-me,” he told her as he set her back down giving her a great big kiss atop her head as he did.
“Come now, let’s get out of here and let Holden have a quiet night and maybe he’ll even watch some football,” Addison grabbed Mia with one hand and gave Holden a look at the same time. She raised one eyebrow as she got pulled out the door by her daughter but the look said that she would be there for him to talk later if he wanted, “I happen to know there is a game on tonight. Channel twelve.”
“I just might do that,” he said as Addison and Mia went out the back door, but he hadn’t wanted to watch football. Once they were in the car and down the road he looked in the frig and discovered that there was nothing ready to warm and eat in there. He would have to put up with a fried egg for something fast, or do some real cooking which he was good at, but had no desire to do. He could also go out and grab a bite to eat. After a long day of painting it was a no brainer, he didn’t want to cook. The painting today had really taken its toll on his body and he ached more than he wanted to admit to himself and more than he would admit to Addison. She would be so in his face about how she knew best and he wasn’t going to give her that kind of satisfaction. So he took his achy body and crawled into the old truck he kept there and drove to the diner.
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